Philadelphia's coach might be a despotic control freak. Philadelphia's players might be hacks. Philadelphia's fans might be the ugliest group of people ever to assemble in one place (don't take it from us, Philly was named America's ugliest city for the third year running). But those are not the top reason why we hate the Philadelphia Union.

That reason is Nick Sakiewicz.

You might have seen the SuperDraft insider videos on MLS's official website; they center around two teams, New York and Philly. On one hand, you have Erik Soler, humble, professional. On the other, you have Sakiewicz, who blows more wind up his own keister than a nor'easter ever could. We get it, Nick, you used to be a goalkeeper. You played for Nantes and Belenenses, right?

But it's not Sakiewicz's fraudulent tales of goalkeeping greatness that gets the blood boiling. It's not his overall smugness or pomposity... Although they help. Oh, what are we kidding, they are part of the whole package.

The whole package that now embraces Philadelphia's supporters. The whole package that turned its back on Metro supporters time and time again, that did more than his share to drive hardcore fans away from Giants Stadium. The whole package that catered to corporations and said that soccer fans are not his target audience. The whole package that called himself "The George Steinbrenner of MLS" (psst, Nick: George actually won a few titles). The whole package that always blamed others for his failings. The whole package whose dismissal in 2005 resulted in screams of joy from the Metro hopeful.

Well, he's Philly's package now. And we'll let the the absurdly-named "Sons of Ben" slurp this "MLS veteran". He is a two-time winner of the MLS Executive of the Year award, after all. And how is that team with which you won the first award, the Tampa Bay Mutiny, doing, Mr. Sakiewicz?

All right, you helped get us a stadium. Too bad it took a little longer that your promised 60-90 days (for those who need a reminder, see Nick-o-lodeon). Too bad that it needed the intervention of Red Bull to pull it out of the quagmire you left at your departure. Too bad.

Enjoy Nick Sakiewicz, ugly Philly fans.