Mario Rosas, Nouma,
Ofori-Quaye, Zayed
Ten Worst: Scoring trialists
February 11, 2015

A week ago, someone named Anatole Abang scored for Metro in a preseason scrimmage. No one has heard of this player before, and, for all we know, no one will hear about him since. (But we don't know! Perhaps the junta in charge saw some kind of potential which will translate into a contract?) In any case, Abang joins the long, strange list of players who have scored for Metro in preseason. These are some of them.

  • 10) Jorge Stranges, 1998
    When we said "strange", we meant it. In 1998, Metro beat Dallas 2:1 in their preseason opener, and the winning goal was scored by someone reportedly named "Jorge Strange". Research leads to believe that he was really Jorge Stranges, a journeyman Argentine striker, who spent almost his entire career in his country's lower divisions.

  • 9) O'Neil Peart, 2001
    Neil Peart is the drummer for Rush. O'Neil Peart is a soccer player of questionable quality. The latter played for the Rough Riders and joined Metro for their European tour after the 2000 season. Drafted in the fifth round that followed, Peart scored in a 2:0 win over Fylkir of Iceland, and in a 3:1 triumph over Amica Wronki of Poland. Cut before the season, he was re-drafted by Kansas City a year later, but failed to make the Wiz as well.

  • 8) Peter Philipakos, 2007
    The Long Island-born Greek-American passed on MLS to go the land of his heritage, and had since spent nearly a decade bouncing between various Greek teams. He trialed with Metro in 2007, and scored on a penalty kick in a 3:1 win over Kansas City. Bruce Arena was not impressed: "I don't think he showed too well. He was pretty unfit and we just didn't have the time for him." Philipakos promptly went back to Greece.

  • 7) Olivier Occean, 2004
    Metro's greatest preseason achievement is obviously winning the 2004 La Manga Cup, and Occean was front and center. The draft pick scored twice, in a 3:1 win over Bodo/Glimt, and a 3:2 semifinal triumph over Ukrainian giants Dynamo Kyiv. Occean impressed, Metro tried to sign him, but the league decided to lowball. Fortunately for him, Occean also impressed other teams that were stationed in La Manga, and was offered a deal by Odd Grenland. He has since scored numerous goals in Norway, played in the Bundesliga, and has been a regular for the Canadian national team.

  • 6) Toni Kolehmainen, 2010
    When the Erik Soler-Hans Backe regime was in charge, they tried to collect a player from each Scandinavian country. Their first crack at Finland came in the form of Kolehmainen, a tongue-twisting defensive midfielder who came through Blackburn's youth academy. Kolehmainen played one game, against a tongue-twisting Scandinavian club Stromsgodset, scored the 2:1 winner, and quickly departed. A year later, Soler-Backe got their Finn in Teemu Tainio. A year after that, Kolehmainen earned his way to the Finnish national team.

  • 5) Leonel Saint-Preux, 2009
    On our website, we give out the prestigious(?) Brian Kelly Memorial Award to the player who leads Metro in preseason scoring. In 2009, the honors went to Saint-Preux, who scored three times: two in a 4:4 tie versus Kansas City, and a game-winning penalty in a 3:2 triumph over Toronto. Considering how 2009 went, perhaps Metro should have signed him... Instead, the Haitian international went off to Malaysia (hold that thought), Tanzania(!), and Bangladesh(!!!).

  • 4) Eamon Zayed, 2005
    A Libyan international? Well, he wasn't one at the time. Back in 2005, Zayed was just your average Irishman, trying to break through. He managed to score in a 1:1 tie against Dallas, featured for Metro numerous times during the preseason, but Bob Bradley passed. Zayed went back to Ireland, and then ended up in the Middle East. There, he somehow became eligible for Libya, and even played for his adopted country in a World Cup qualifier. He then returned to Ireland, was named that league's player of the year, and is currently on the same team as El Hadji Diouf in... Malaysia.

  • 3) Peter Ofori-Quaye, 2004
    Once considered one of the best young players in the world, Ofori-Quaye became the youngest player to score in the Champions League (doing so at the age of 17), became a full international for Ghana at 18, and starred at Greece's Olympiacos. Rumors of age falsification were abound, as his star crashed as quickly as it ascended. He scored for Metro in a 1:0 win against DC, but was not offered a contract. After some time away from soccer, he returned to Greece, and even earned a recall to the Ghanaian national team.

  • 2) Pascal Nouma, 2005
    Nouma had scored a lot of goals in native France and Turkey. His goal for Metro came on a preseason trip to Ecuador, in a 3:3 tie with Quevedo. After failing to latch on, Nouma played two games for Livingston in Scotland, and retired. He is best known for grabbing his balls after scoring. He is now trying to be an actor in Turkey. Enough said.

  • 1) Mario Rosas, 2003
    A playmaking midfielder who played for Barcelona at the age of 17? Yes, please? Bradley thought he had a gem, and Mario even scored on a direct free kick in his preseason debut, a 4:0 win over the USA U-17s. But it unraveled quickly. The supposed gem was anything but. When asked if Mario was to be signed, Bradley was blunt: "Mario Rosas is a young player who we feel has talent, but we felt we needed to find a player that fits our team better. We made the decision so he can likely pursue other opportunities." Mario went back to Spain's lower divisions, and even played in glorious Azerbaijan.
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